You're never completely yourself when around other people. Every situation you're in with somebody else, you are yourself plus them, because they have an influence on you without you even realising it, without them realising it, and before anyone has even spoken. But then, if the other person is also not completely themselves when around you, does that makes for a false situation, and where does it come from? In a sense, this makes every social situation a game, in which we all play characters.

The only time I feel like I am 100% myself is when I'm by myself, and I suppose that's what I love about solitute sometimes. Although I wouldn't necessarily want to be by myself all the time, and in fact it takes away some of the meaning if there is nobody at all to share any of yourself with, I think everyone needs significant time alone along the way to rebalance themselves. Some of the most joyful experiences I've had are when I'm by myself. I wonder how many people can say that about themselves?

I suppose that the most ideal romantic relationship is one where you are able to be 100% yourself with that person. I don't think that happens in a lot of relationships, because often people will be slightly mismatched. Is that due to a fear of being alone? It would be really nice to be in a relationship where you are able to completely be yourself though. I wonder whether the reason some people don't spend much time alone is that they are afraid of who they are, they are afraid that there would be complete nothingness, complete silence, or they won't like what they see when they look inside.

I think it's true that you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else or let anyone love you. When people enter into relationships as an unhappy person expecting the relationship to solve all their problems, that could be when problems occur, because they take it out on the other person?

Tags: identity | self | people | friends | relationships | rant | pondering | idea

Blowing hot and cold,
You blow me hot and cold,
Just like a dream...
...and then like nothing,
It's like a wall,
Then you're freaked out,
Like something I don't know,
And you don't know yourself,
Like you're losing some control,
Like you trying to keep a grip,
And every time I think we click
I get so carried away,
And you have to stop me,
Or I'll spin you into infinity,
And what will happen then?

Tags: poem | poems | poet | poetry | poets

You could:
Stay up all night,
Scream and shout,
And dance about,
Live the crazy life,
Live the dream,
Live it all,
And everything imbetween,
Fall in love with insanity,
Drink till you're drunk,
Drink till you laugh,
Drink till you bleed
All your thoughts on the floor,
And then kick them around,
Till they're all battered and bruised,
But where does it get you,
And the end of the day,
But a big gaping hole
In the centre of your head?

I'm glad I'm not you.

Tags: poem | poems | poet | poets | poetry | health | alcohol

In another world
We could be perfect,
We could be forever,
The deepest secrets untold
And shared in ways
That other people only dream of;

But in this world,
We are so different;
You are black
And I am golden yellow
And red
And orange
And bright sky blue
And everything imbetween;

But you are black
And sometimes white,
But inside I know your true colours,
I know that it's all just for show,
And maybe one day
You will realise
It's better to be true to yourself
Than to paint a false picture.

In another world,
In another life,
In another time,
In another place,
We would be perfect,
But right here,
Right now,
We are not.

Tags: poems | poem | poetry | tagname | people | personality | fake | genuine | love | romance | women