That last message got caught by the spam filter again, and arrived 2
days late again. I don't know! What is this world coming to?!¿?

What's next? I'll go to the bank to draw out some money, but they'll
have to ring me on my mobile phone to check it's really me?! Or maybe
one day the Police will turn up at my parent's house, and they'll be
like, "Who are you? Why are you here in this house?" and I'll be like,
"They're my parents," and the Police will be like, "Why are you still
living here?" and I'll be like, "I'm too poor to live anywhere else at
the moment, without resorting to floating my body on the stock market."

Anyway, time for a proper story...

Once upon a time (11am yesterday - or if the spam filter catches this
message, a 11am 3 days ago), a man called Gerald woke up (he'd had a
late night the night before, staying up surfing the internet for answers
to the question "Why isn't Planet Earth cube-shaped?"), and yawned a big
yawny-faced yawn, so wide he nearly swallowed his own head (that's how
tired he was).

But oh - shock horror! Right at that moment, a cat flew past in a remote
controlled helicopter. It looked terrified and bemused, flapping its
paws around, and had an expression on its face which said: "Why does
this kind of thing always have to happen to me?"

The End.