I wish to apologise for any tie-ping errors you may have noticed in my
last massage, if you bothered to read it. I suppose I must have been so
frantic to get the message out about the spam filter.

If you didn't bother to read it, you really have no idea what you
missed. I answered the actual riddle to meaning of life, and there you
are totally oblivious. Poor you, in your little world of sitting in a
chair eating smarties and scratching your elbows. Elbows, elbows,
felbows, melbows, trelbows, wibbly wobbly hibbly wobbly dungerees. Etc.

Anyway, who wants to hear a little story?

Okay, then I shall begin...

Once upon a time (not very long ago, but long enough ago that you
definately wouldn't have been alive when it happened, whatever it is
that I'm about to tell you), in a very far away land (e.g. Norway-
unless of course you life in, or close to, Norway, in which case one of
your dead relatives may have witnessed this very event), a man (whose
name - Dave - shall remain unknown) was busy in his garage (it had a
green door) building a model helicopter to fly his pet cat towards that
place above the clouds where the sun always shines.

"Simon," he said (his cat's called Simon, by the way). "You have lived
for far too long in this grey, dull shit hole of a place, and I can see
the tears just acheing to burst out from behind your tightly closed
eyelids, that you yearn for the warmth of the sun on your beautiful
face. Oh my beatufil cat, oh how beatiful you are. And that's not a gay
thing to say, because you're a male cat, not a male human."

"Meow meow meow," said Simon.

"Yes I know," said The Man. "I quite agree, life really had been
terrible down here."

"Meow meow,"

"Yes, I know, that's why I want to fly you up above the clouds. Up up up
up up up, up, up above the clouds. Up up above the clouds. Up. Above the
clouds. Way up, all the way up, right through them and out the top,
where it's always sunny and you can fly around with a big smile on your
face, purring like the beautiful purring kitty cat that you are."

"Meow."

The End.